A day...

That's all today was... not a great day and not a terrible one. Just one more day closer to wherever it is I'm going and whatever it is I'm becoming.

I had this job offer at work... I definitely am not turning it down. It's a chance to work in the backroom all day and basically work by myself. I can handle that sorta job. No customers to torment me and no boss staring over my shoulder... and better yet no idiot supervisor who's supposed to be in control of things just up and disappearing.

Speaking of which... My dept. mgr. was mad today. I know he was talked to about how he handles his dept and his relationship with our video vendor. I don't know if he figured out that it was I who complained to management or not. Frankly, I don't care. I spoke up for myself and my fellow associates. I did what I felt needed to be done.

Anything else exciting going on? Ummm... I continue to have this weird pimp reputation at work. I don't know how it came about but I like it... LOL!

Oh, I got to talk to Nic today... she gave me a holla and I hollaed back. ;-) She's so not right... and Nic if you're reading this... I love ya, sister! You certainly brightened my day. Oh! And tell Bryan that he'd better watch his back 'cause... well, you know. ;-)

*ponders*
Anything else I should include? Oh yeah! I got my Star Wars fanclub kit today... I'm such a true geek!

Now I'll leave you with this...



What Classic Movie Are You?
personality tests by similarminds

Framed!

So yeah... I spent my night after work framing up about 14 different posters and pictures that I found laying on top of my bookshelf... All but one are of course Star Wars. The other is a LOTR poster. Most of them are from wal-mart... in some form. ;-) I spent massive amounts of money on this... money I don't really have but oh well! If I didn't do this now these pics woulda succumbed to time and age. I'm happy about the results.

I also learned about myself tonight at work. I found out that I must be some sort of super stud with mojo to spare. LOL! I heard two different rumors about me... One, that I seduced my 19 year old boss and we had a bad breakup... Two, that I'm now seeing the 40 year old loss prevention lady in our store. I didn't even know I had these tawdry relationships! I wish someone would have told me so I coulda played it up! ROTFL!

Anyway... I'm outtie for now.

Peace and chocolate cake!

Choices, Environment and Chemistry

What makes us who we are? What sculpts us as individuals into the people that we are and what makes us change? Does anyone ever REALLY change or do they just choose to fight or give in to their impulses?

*chuckles*

Deep questions I guess.... I've had a lot to think about the last coupla days. Friends, family, fellow associates.... all of them have brought me to this quandry. The title of this entry are the three factors that I believe are the answers to these questions... The only thing that eludes me is to what extent these factors figure into the equation.

Choices... Are we just the product of the choices we've made? Do we conciously or even unconciously decide the course of our lives?

Environment... Does how and where we grow up affect the people we become? Do the things that happen to us chisel out our image?

Chemistry... Can human behavior be broken down and attributed to chemical levels and activity in the brain?

*smiles*

I know you all have your opinions about this subject... I'd truly like to hear your views. I believe that who we are is a combination of those three factors in some sort of complex equation that is different for each person. They say that life is 10% what happens to us and 90% how we handle it... but each of us see things so differently that what one person sees another person totally misses.

*chuckles*

That brings me to another subject. I'll admit this here and now in front of you all. I do not now and do not know if I ever shall understand the female of the human species. Men are usually logical in some fashion... one thing leads to another in some sort of progression... Females are emotional... and that is... as Nomad said... "a mass of conflicting impulses"

*grins*

Ok... I think I've said enough... amongst you all probably only one will know of what I'm speaking.... the rest of you may find out at some point. For now... I'm out!

Is this still my computer?

So I got my comp back.... or the shell of what was once my computer. The hard drive was wiped whilst it was away. *pouts* I've been spending inordinate amounts of time putting it all back together. I still have a bit to go but it's closer... at least I got DoD back. *grins*

Lessee... what else is going on? Ummm... I don't wanna complain about the same old things. It's getting tiresome. I should feel blessed that those are my only problems. There are those who have it so much worse than I.

*chuckles* I may have just taken away everything I have to blog about but... oh well.

I went shopping today. I spent tons of money... most of which I don't have at the moment but... *shrugs* It's Christmas presents and it all should be paid off before I run up a huge bill to go to Celebration III.

Oh well... I don't wanna think anymore. I dunno if this blog will continue to exist or if I'll be able to recapture the therapy of just spilling my guts here. It would seem that being without my computer has changed my perspective on things and I need to sort it out.

I'm outtie for now!

Too Much To Process!

Yeah... here at Seth's borrowing his comp for what should hopefully be the last time. Mine is fixed and shipped according to HP. *prays to the computer gods that they didn't wipe his hard drive* I'll make a sacrifice to Bill Gates even! ;-p

So... lessee where to start? Work? That place is horrific! Don't wanna talk about it. Home? *wrinkles nose* Been better. Ummm.... *ponders*

One good thing has come from not having my comp. I've been devouring the NJO books at an alarming rate. Good stuff!

*sighs* Things have been goin on in my life that I normally would have blogged about. LONG blogs too... Like seeing the ex-little chica, the idiocy at work, the feeling of being a stranger in my own home and so on... but since I haven't had my comp I've retreated again. Back to shoving it all deep down inside and only letting it out to Seth. God bless him! I love him. He's never and I mean never made me feel terrible about what I think, feel or say. He just listens and lets me go and then tries to help me figure things out. We all need someone like that in our lives and I'm so glad that my cousin is my best friend.

I have so much punched down inside of me that I want to say.... I just can't find the words to express it any longer. So now I guess I'm outtie for now... But I'll leave you with this.

Limp Bizkit: "Hold on"

"you keep your distance i can't deny you i've got the feeling can't satisfy you i've got your picture on the wall i got the picture, long gone you keep your wishes i'll keep my feelings there goes another one that kept me breathing i'm waiting for youi know your leaving i still adore you you never need me hold on, i found another way to let you go away hold on, you found another way to bleed my soul away the things you told me to hear you speak i'm burning slowly i'm growing weak you bring me closer to yesterday yesterday's a million miles away why can't you hear me? why can't i sleep and i don't understand what keeps me breathing i'm waiting for you i know your leaving i'll still adore you you'll never need me hold on,i found another way to let you go away?hold on, you found another way to bleed my soul? away [repeats 4 times]"

*cries*

So... I called the dorks at HP. Yeah! They know what they're doing! (pauses for sarcastic effect) High quality tech support brought to you by high caliber doobie smokers! *coughs dramatically* Anyway... the long and the short of it is this... I'm gonna be without my computer for a while yet. *sighs* I'll post when I can from here at Seth's... *sets up a cot in the guest room* I have to wait for HP to send me a box to ship them my comp, so they can fix it *crosses fingers* and ship it back. *rolls eyes* I dunno how long it's gonna be and I don't know how long I can survive without it... I'm pulling out all the stops however... I'm playing video games on all six of my systems! ;-p

Anyway.... not much else to report... besides boredom and a few other small things. Like hanging with Seth and Phil. Oh! And I got some of my SW posters framed! Woohoo!

Anyway.. I'm offeth for now!

Voice from Beyond

So yeah... Here I am sitting at Seth's house after spending a day hanging with him. Where have I been? I've been having some computer problems that as I know Seth informed you all of. I have to call HP and see if I can get them to fix my computer as it is still under warranty... Let's all keep our fingers crossed because I hate being without my computer!!! I can't chat with all my lovely friends, can't play DoD and can't access any of my files that I need. It's rough! Anyway, I can't steal Seth's comp for forever so... *chuckles* I just wanted to let you all know that I'm fine, I haven't done anything stupid, I miss you all and hope to back soon.